A Playwright
Today, I am a playwright.
The Play: One has-been wannabe and one also-ran wannabe
The Players: Mathatir (M) and LKY (L)
ACT I: Mid-point at the causeway linking Malaysia and Singapore.
Scene I: The two protagonists throwing brickbats at each other.
L: Since Malaysia’s independence you’ve marginalized the Chinese to the extent that they no longer enjoy equal educational opportunities.
M: What is the percentage of Malays studying in your universities?
L: We admit everyone on merit. No racial discrimination.
M: We give everyone credit. Those we admit, especially those who are poorest in the country, we give all the help they need. Can Singapore be as just and equitable a society as Malaysia?
L: Right! Just look at some of the products of your universities. Half of your graduates do not even have the skills to work for multinationals. They are good enough only to join the civil service, almost exclusively Malay and not above corruption.
M: I graduated from your university, and let me tell you what I think of your students. They are ball-less sycophants! Besides, if your universities are so great, why did you and your children have to go overseas for further studies?
L: NUS was rated 31st in the world by Newsweek. I doubt MU even made it to the top 500!
M: Ya sure, but look at the composition of your student body.At least 5% are from MY country. And what about the faculty? Many are from Malaysia also.
L: That’s just it! Your brightest Chinese are ignored and rejected in your country. Many flock to Singapore where they’re allowed to shine.
M: You want them – you take them. Take them all! At no charge!
L: I’m a fair person, as you know, so I won’t take advantage of the situation without giving you a corresponding benefit. I’m willing to take your Chinese in exchange for all the Malays in Singapore.
M: You get five and a half million Chinese; I get less than one million Malays. Oh well, I’ll let you win this time. (very sarcastically)
End of Scene II: The two characters shake hands and go back to their own mainlands.
ACT II: M’s in his car, ten minutes later.
Scene I: M telephoning L.
M: (Speaking in a more conciliatory tone than usual.) By the way, many of my supporters are pushing me to get you to issue a public apology about your statement about our Chinese compatriots. So, are you going to apologise?
L: You do not apologise for the truth.
M: I don’t care what the truth it is. You keep your truth to your side of the border. (Getting increasingly agitated.) I know a nasty truth or two about you, but I’ll keep that to myself, if you wanna play ball.
L: Go ahead, who will believe you? (Getting very irritated) The world was at my feet in Singapore this past week. The IMF/World Bank delegates lapped up everything I said and had to say. I’m still king around here, y’know.
M: Don’t let a bit of praise get to your head. If you can show me that you have real influence with the Chinese in China, in Taiwan, and in Hongkong, then you can be rightfully proud. When you’re not totally accepted by your own, then there’s nothing to brag about. Even in Singapore, sources tell me a large majority of the people can’t wait to see you go. Bow out gracefully, lah, just like I did.
L: You keep your counsel to yourself, please. Anyway, what grace are you talking about? It’s more disgrace the way you’re trying to reenter the political arena where you couldn’t even get re-elected to represent your old constituency. And blaming your PM - whom you had chosen yourself - doesn’t it smack of very poor judgment on your part? Have you forgotten already your boo-boo with that other deputy of yours? Have you ever stopped for a moment to reflect on your inability to bet on the right horse?
M: I stand for what is right. If it was my own son who had committed a grave error, I would not hesitate to chastise him. I may have made mistakes myself, but I will never cover up.
L: What are you insinuating? That I cover up for my family and myself?
M: Sue me! (M slams down phone and laughs in disgust.)
ACT III: Exchange of emails.
Scene I: Office of L - L reads email addressed to M before sending it out.
“Dear M:
Blair has said in his farewell speech that all leaders have to go eventually. He’s such a gentleman and a good loser. After successfully leading the Labour Party for its longest stint in the British Parliament, he was able to keep his cool when calls kept coming in fast and furious for his resignation. He even joked about his rival running off with his crown but not with his wife.Why can’t we be like Blair. After all, we both had an English education and have a high respect for British traditions. Why can’t we act like British gentlemen? When our time is up, let’s leave with a smile and wish our successors well.
In my case, I should be more than happy to retire to a private life, as my son is now the top honcho in Singapore and many of my relatives in powerful position as well. Tell me, when you stepped down, what was it that finally pushed you into it. As far as I know, your party and the country wanted you to continue in the leadership in Malaysia. What were the compelling reasons for your leaving?
I’ve said publicly that I’d continue as long as my constituency still elects me and the party faithful is not brave enough to request I relinquish the MM post. I don’t know how to bow out in good grace.
We understand each other, you and I. I’m sure you’re finding it very difficult to take a back seat in Malaysian politics. I don’t have any advice for you since I’m struggling to cling on to power and prestige in the light of a changed world. They’d have to carry me out struggling, but hopefully, not my feet first.
Your trying to make a comeback is laudable, even necessary, if your very sense of self and self-worth is to stay intact. I wish you every success.
Meantime, how about let’s scale down on public pronouncements of our mutual dislike? Bashing each other’s countries has been good for local politics, but as elder statesmen, we should look beyond that and work in cooperation. The destinies of Malaysia and Singapore are so intertwined we would be amiss, and judged unfavourably by history, in not subsuming our personal ambitions for the greater good of our twin countries.
As for your pet half-bridge to replace the causeway, let’s give it a time frame, say ten years, to build a full bridge, one beautiful enough to rival any in the world. Yes, the causeway remains a symbol of British colonialism, and an eyesore to boot; we do need something else to symbolise the independence and rise of our two countries.
Finally, I’d like you to know that the re-merger of Malaysia and Singapore is one dream that I’ve not stopped habouring.
Best regards,
L"
Scene II: M’s office at home.
M reads L’s email and goes ballistic.
He decides to rent his outrage in reply.
"My Dear L:
Your email makes me laugh!
Instead of apologising for making the ridiculous statement about the Chinese in Malaysia, you’ve chosen to seek sympathy from and camaraderie with me.
I don’t care if you hang on to your position until you become completely power-mad and blurringly senile. You’ve created the new Singapore, this I’ll concede, but you have nothing left to contribute to the state, let alone Asean and the rest of Asia. The world might have been at your feet at the recent IMF/World Bank meetings, but it was just a case of diplomats behaving correctly at the host’s residence. He’s a fool who takes a compliment for an endorsement!
I’ve never considered you a friend, personal or otherwise. I have enough enemies and I certainly don’t need your kind of friendship. You’re too calculative to have any sincere feelings for others.
Habibi may be backsliding about his “red dot” label for Singapore. But as far as I am concerned, the red refers to the communist hierarchical structure of your government. As for the dot, well, that is exactly what it is – that tiny freak of your own imagination that seeks to roar as a lion. Beware, that which takes on too much to rule ends up being overthrown!
We don’t need you, as a friend, or as a neighbour. Do what you wish, say what you will, but the tiger in Malaysia is more real. It is regal, it is genteel; and it doesn’t seek to domineer.
Nevertheless, when it comes to a fight.…………
M"
End of Act II: The protagonists retreat to plot their next moves.
ACT IV: At the causeway, or what’s left of it.
Scene I: The Malaysian side of the causeway has been dynamited and collapses into the Johor Strait. Politicians and police amass on both sides in disbelief. Thousands of onlookers are less sanguine about what’s happened.
M is howling with amazement and unconcealed glee;
L is seething with rage and crying unabashedly…
L: (Speaking to himself, while inspecting the collapsed causeway.)
I should have given in to M! I should have agreed to demolish the causeway and build a bridge to replace it. Looks like there’s no choice now. I’ll have to stop laughing at the scenic half-bridge as I’m looking now at a more un-scenic half-causeway. Have my arrogance and intransigence finally done me in!
M: (Cannot contain his disgust at his opposing number, but displaying great satisfaction at the free flowing water on the JB side of the causeway. Cheekily waves to L across the water.)
There’s no need for me to tell you I told you so. You told me off enough times to tell me you have much need to repent. The religion you believe in, one-upmanship anprosper-only-thyself - see if that redeems you now. (Becomes suddenly altruistic.)
You’ve never believed in or accepted my goodness, but I will pray to Allah to forgive you. As there’re no olive trees here, I’ll offer you a pandan leaf in final friendship. It’s time we both sailed off to meet our maker. I would need you there with me to relieve the boredom. Say whatever they like, they won’t be able to convince me you’re not a worthy sparring partner.
L: (Listening but not hearing.)
Drag me wherever you want but I’m not ready to leave just yet. Singapore still needs me. On top of that, there’re the reserves that need taking care of. I don’t trust anyone not to squander them away after I’m gone.
M: For God’s sake! Either bring all the money along or spend it (like I did) to build a few grandiose monuments in your memory. This way you don’t ever have to leave. And if in forty years’ time, should they tear down your statue in rebellion, well, my dear L, you’d have built yourself another little dotdom in the other world. So, let’s get going!
L: (Sighs the longest sigh.)
Why can’t I see the light? Why can’t I be enlightened? But, what’s this terrible rumbling …
Scene II: A thousand-kilometre fissure at the bottom of the ocean alongside Batam and Bintan opened up into grand canyons causing the two islands to cave in under the waters. The resulting tidal waves have submerged Singapore’s coastal areas, including the two financial districts, after washing away what was left of the causeway. The deluge threatens to engulf the entire island.
L: Save me! Save me! My dearest friend! My beloved neighbour!
Curtain.
posted by Your Life that I Live @ 1:39 PM
